Witty One Liners Quotes
The best sayings about Witty One Liners that you can share on Instagram, Pinterest, Facebook and other social networks!
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I always love it whenever Rose delivers one of her witty one-liners—particularly when it’s a completely serious situation. The contrast always amuses me, but then, I’m biased.
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There are three kinds of people: those who can count, and those who cannot.
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Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
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I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.
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If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
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The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.
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Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
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I love deadlines. I like the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
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A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station….
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A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
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A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.
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I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
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Two wrongs don't make a right.
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Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.
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Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
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I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
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I am not afraid of death. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
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Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
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My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.
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Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
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I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.
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When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
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The second mouse gets the cheese!
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If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
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Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
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If you can't convince them, confuse them.
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The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese
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Top Authors
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Leonard Peltier Activist -
Laura San Giacomo Actress -
Lauren Greenfield Artist -
Laurence D'Orsay Author
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Lawrence Wright Author -
Leanne Payne Author -
Lerone Bennett, Jr. Author -
Lawrence English Composer -
Len Hutton Cricket Player -
Lee Marvin Film actor -
Leon Bourgeois French statesman -
Laurie Garrett Journalist -
Lawrence Beesley Journalist -
Laura Esquivel Novelist -
Leon Bloy Novelist -
Lee Smolin Physicist -
Larry L. King Playwright -
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Leo Houlding Rock Climber -
Larry Constantine Software Engineer -
Lenny Santos Song Arranger -
Leo Rosten Teacher -
Laura Kinsale Writer -
Lawrence Block Writer
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